Become the Change You Wish to See in the World

Cancer and my family go way back. Like a burglar lurking in the shadows, it waits to see a crack in the front door so it can attack the harmony of our happy home. At first it was my great-grandmother who died of ovarian cancer. Next it was my grandmother who died of breast cancer. My mother said simply that they didn’t go to the doctor early enough. They were ashamed of their disease and let it end their life rather than go public with it. I tucked away that rational piece of advice into my memory banks, but I didn’t think about it much beyond that. I was a typical child – young and invincible.

Then twelve years ago, my mother was diagnosed with Hodgkin Lymphoma. Like many people in their twenties, I was focused on my career. I was busy climbing the corporate ladder and buying my first house. So I stood by her through multiple rounds of chemotherapy and radiation treatment and went on with life’s priorities.

As I got older, cancer crept closer. In 2006, my sister Debbi was diagnosed with breast cancer. We approached her battle the same as my mother’s – with no doubt she would win it.

In 2008, in the midst of Debbi’s fight, my sister Shelly was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. By this point, we were quite the experts. Have a couple surgeries, inject a few lethal drugs through the chemo port and call it a day. I went on with my successful career, took fabulous trips to far off places like Brazil and Norway, bought a house in my favorite neighborhood and didn’t really worry about anything else. Then in December of that year, we were told that Shelly’s ovarian cancer was terminal. With a sigh and a shrug, the experts recommended spending as much quality time with family as possible. There was nothing more to be done.

Three short months later and one month before Shelly died, my mother was diagnosed with Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia (CLL). Her doctor’s advice was to watch and wait. Wait for what? To get sick enough for more gut-wrenching surgery or radical drug treatments? Should we all wait to be diagnosed with a terminal illness to do something about our health? As the last remaining female in my family not to be diagnosed with cancer, I suddenly felt like I had a bulls-eye on my forehead. Rather than accept my family genes as a predetermined curse, I decided it was time to do something about it.

I am a member of the processed fast-food generation. I grew up eating Hamburger Helper, Kraft Macaroni & Cheese and Top Ramen and didn’t think twice about it. They were tasty and convenient meals. Nutrition what? Processed who? When I finally had my own kitchen cabinets to stock, they were lined with the best products that General Mills, Kraft and the other big boys could produce. I enjoyed a healthy income without a lot of healthy food to go along with it.

It wasn’t until Shelly’s terminal diagnosis that my veil of ignorance was lifted. Faced with losing my sister, only five years older than myself, I realized I could no longer wait to do something about my own cancer risk. Never before had I felt my own mortality as I did then. The support of family and friends was critical in my ability to deal with the death of my sister. It’s a pain that only people who have experienced it can understand. But equally as important, was the journey I began with food as a central part of my healing. I began a vegan-inspired whole foods detoxification diet. After three weeks, I felt better than I had in my entire life. I was beginning to understand food as the foundation for a healthy, vibrant life. If I ate better, I felt better. If I felt better, I lived each day more richly.

Fortunately, I have yet to understand what it feels like to be told you have cancer, let alone try to figure out what to do about it. Most patients I know, both family and friends, have moved from diagnosis to treatment within a matter of days. My sister, Debbi, explained it this way:

“Honestly, I didn’t do any research on what other treatments were available.  I had 5 doctors – experts in their fields – recommend immediate surgery, double mastectomy, followed by chemotherapy, radiation and then a complete hysterectomy and oophorectomy.  I felt a lot of pressure to make decisions quickly and without direction, so I did what was recommended.  No one ever offered alternatives or suggested another way of thinking.”

Each surgery required months of recuperation. Each drug treatment meant debilitating days in bed, unable to interact with the rest of the world. And the price tag for her treatment is already more than half a million dollars. The pressure to do something must be intense. And the typical something offered by the mainstream medical profession entails only painful surgeries and lethal drugs that cost more than many people earn in a decade.  

Unfortunately, fighting to survive – especially after a terminal diagnosis – does not come easily. First, it requires an awakening – the desire to question everything and everyone on how you might live longer. It also takes commitment to an ongoing pursuit of knowledge. And finally, it requires action – continually searching for more information and determining what works through trial and error. To whom do you turn? The experts? Family and friends? Others suffering from the same disease? The good news is that the Internet provides a plethora of resources for virtually any chronic illness you can think of. The bad news is that you have to comb through that voluminous mass of information to separate the wheat from the chafe. And once you find ideas and insights, you need to review those with trusted advisors and develop a plan of attack. That’s an overwhelming thought when faced with making quick decisions that your life depends on.  It’s literally a race against the clock. Life is too important not to start the race.

When I began my vegan diet, my Internet searches revolved primarily around finding inspirational healthy recipes to keep me motivated. After my mother’s CLL diagnosis, however, my searches turned to the stories of healing behind the recipes. The more I searched, the more stories I found of people who awakened to a lifestyle of healthy eating only after facing a terminal diagnosis. Like the numerous survivors of My Crazy Sexy Life, an online social network for people who are learning to use nutrition and holistic approaches to battling their diseases and living better. A quick search on Google turns up literally tens of thousands of people with first-hand accounts who have made diet and lifestyle changes to extend their lives or even reverse their conditions. People like Rhio O’Conner, who was diagnosed with mesothelioma in 2001 and given less than a year to live. Rather than accept defeat, Rhio turned to holistic medicines and diet changes to live another eight years beyond his diagnosis. Or Debbie Young, a woman with CLL who began eating a raw diet upon her diagnosis in 2007 and has better white blood cell counts now than when she was diagnosed.

Unfortunately, there is only so much you can learn on your own.  I don’t have a team of experts to turn to like Rhio or Debbie or others fighting their diseases. The experience of my family leaves me with little hope that if I did, those experts would be able to offer much beyond surgery, chemotherapy or radiation. So I am turning to alternative experts, by enrolling in the Certified Natural Chef program at Bauman College. I have decided to commit my life to the continuous learning of how food impacts our daily lives, learning how to eat healthier – not just to reduce my risk of disease, but to live each day as vibrantly as possible. I am also committed to inspiring others to awaken to healthy living through my blog, Be-Eat-Drink. Upon graduation, I hope to further inspire awareness and change through consulting with restaurants and food companies, as well as through individual training and education.

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world” said Mahatma Gandhi. I wish to help awaken others to the opportunity to live longer, healthier lives. More than a million American lives are lost each year to cancer and heart disease. Millions more are battling their diseases, only awakening to the need to live healthier when their very survival depends on it. I am committed to inspiring people to awaken before disease strikes, to saving millions of lives and billions of dollars spent on poisonous drug treatments and agonizing surgeries. I am committed to making it easier for people to eat and live healthier, because we deserve to do more than survive. We deserve to thrive.